31 days: here i am lord

I might as well start this process with the song that I used for the background of my “button” for the series: Here I Am, Lord. Because, here I am. Last year I wasn’t quite successful at my attempt to complete the 31 days link-up, so I was hesitant to try again this year. I pondered it. I pondered the commitment it will take for 31 straight days, knowing that my schedule for these next 31 days is a bit crazy. I was scared, to be honest. I already consider myself a “failure” at blogging compared to a number of the blogs I read – those who do it for a job & those who do it just for fun, too. Blogging is hard and my life is crazy. I doubted myself, but then there was grace. So what if I couldn’t finish last year. Who knows? I may not finish this year, too. But a song hit me like a ton of bricks one day while I was driving to get my kiddos from school last week and I just decided that I’ll give it another shot. So…here I am. Lord, use me & this space.

Here I Am, Lord
by Dan Schutte

I, the Lord of sea and sky,
I have heard My people cry.
All who dwell in dark and sin,
My hand will save.
I who made the stars of night,
I will make their darkness bright.
Who will bear My light to them?
Whom shall I send?

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

I, the Lord of snow and rain,
I have born my peoples pain.
I have wept for love of them, They turn away.
I will break their hearts of stone,
Give them hearts for love alone.
I will speak My word to them,
Whom shall I send?

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

I, the Lord of wind and flame,
I will tend the poor and lame.
I will set a feast for them,
My hand will save
Finest bread I will provide,
Till their hearts be satisfied.
I will give My life to them,
Whom shall I send?

Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
I have heard You calling in the night.
I will go Lord, if You lead me.
I will hold Your people in my heart.

If you’ve never experienced the hymn, it’s based around Isaiah 6:8, or the entirety of Isaiah 6, which is God’s call to Isaiah. The hymn is beautiful. It’s often used for ordinations and many a youth Sunday services in churches. In my life, though, it’s always spoken meaning. Long before I was able to realize the story behind the song, the story of Isaiah, the understanding of God’s call on our lives, and the like, I was able to recognize the power and beauty in the words. I was able to realize that it meant something amazing to look at God and say “yes, I’m here. use me. do what you need. i’ll go. you lead. and i’ll carry your people with  me, too.”

These words, this hymn, that statement, that promise – they have all carried me from a very young age and continue to be my guiding words and hymn to this day. One day, should the Lord still have plans for me to be ordained, I will be including this song into my service, and I will most likely be overwhelmed with singing it along with the community that has carried me along this path. And even if I don’t become ordained, these words will still speak meaning into my life and be a daily prayer.

Dan Schutte wrote this about the hymn:

For me, the story of “Here I Am, Lord” tells of the God who overshadows us, giving power to our stumbling words and the simple works of our hands, and making them into something that can be a grace for people. The power God gives is far beyond what we could have planned or created.

May the words of this hymn be meaningful, powerful and even transformative to you, too.

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